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Old 5th March 2005, 05:09 PM   #23
Join Date: Jan 2004
Posts: 3,287
I was bored, so I transcribed the section on healthcare. The panel is Janet Reno, Dave Foley (from News Radio and nowadays poker), and Dr. Bernadine Healy, ex head of the Red Cross or something similar.

ETA: All spelling errors, and some grammatical errors are obviously mine.

Bill Maher: Why do we need so much healthcare if we weren't sick? And why are we sick? What is the main thing we do to ourselves? Eat.

Janet Reno: One of the main things we do to ourselves is we do not take care of our children when they come into this world by providing proper vaccinations, proper preventative medical care, proper strong supportive healthcare for infants and children in this country.

BM: I don't believe in vaccinaiton either. That's a... well, that's a... what? That's another theory that I think is flawed, that we go by the Louis Pasteur theory, even though Louis Pasteur renounced it on his own deathbed and said that Beauchamp(s) was right: it's not the invading germs, it's the terrain. It's not the mosquitoes, it's the swamp that they are breeding in.

JR: What are you going to do about smallpox? (something of the sort, crowd was clapping)

BM: What am I going to do about smallpox?

JR: Mmm huh.

BM: Not go to the chicken farm. But eh... no.

Dave Foley: Well po... You gotta say, the polio vaccine turned out well. You know...

Dr. Bernardine Healy: I think there... I mean I think it's great theatre to, when you're well, to say "Oh all those sick people, let's dismiss them." But you know, when you're sick there's nothing better than having a good medical establishment.

BM: But why do they get sick? You think it's normal that people need this ammount of drugs?

Dr.BH: Well I think that people get sick and we don't know entirely why they get sick, and the older, they get the sicker they get. Every 10 years that you add on to your life you have a higher chance of getting sick. And you get atherosclerosis, you get cancer... I mean the notion...

BM: Why...?

Dr.BH: ...that somehow when you get sick it's your fault...

BM: It's the...'s the wrong attitude. It's not your fault. You don't have a guilt trip because you get sick. People get sick. You know, they say that all around the world people think that death is inevitable. In the United States of America we think it's an option.

BM (at the same time as the last sentence): You're in denial.

Dr.BH: I mean, death is not an option.

BM: You're in denial, about I think is a key fact, which is it is the at... people get sick because of an aggregate toxicity, because their body has so much poison in it, from the air, the water... Yes, much of it is not our fault and we can't control it. But a lot of it we can and even the food people think is good for them, is bad, and I'm not presenting myself as a paradigm. I do cruddy things to my body too and I enjoy them. But when I do them, I'm not in denial. I'm not eating fat free cheese and saying: "You know what, I'm healthy for eating this." I'm saying: "Oh yeah, this is chemical goop and this is killing me."

Dr.BH: Well, you know... right now I think you would be the greatest spokesman for anti-smoking. I mean, really, the most dangerous thing people do to themselves is smoke cigarrettes. It's toxic to their lungs, it causes all sorts of cancers. It causes lung disease, heart disease.

BM: But we know that. Noone's arguing that smoking...

Dr.BH: But then why are 25% of Americans still smoking?

Blah blah blah talk about smoking and tobacco companies and personal responsability and whatnot.
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