Originally Posted by quadraginta
And that's why, in this day and age (a 19th century expression), a rule change mandating real-time remote participation in debates of this gravity is necessary. God he knoweth it's feasible. Senator Grabpussy (R Woebegin) might orate sitting on his curile toilet and it wouldn't matter -- and it sure'n hell wouldn't let him hide from his stern duty.
"Hullo? Missus Senate Pres'dint? I cain't raise a signal out here in Gutpile. Reckon I won't be a votin' this time around."
"Fax your vote in, you clod!"
"Uh. Wull, I think the snow's jest 'bout to bury the phone pole, 'n --"
"Or forget next year's pork train for your godforsaken state."
"Aye! Nay! Swear me in! Cuss me out if yuh wanter! Anythang you say, Missus Senate Prez Ma'am Sir! (Scuse me while I shift m' quid. Dang near swallered it.)"
And so on at any length.