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Old 15th August 2019, 06:57 PM   #20
TragicMonkey
Poisoned Waffles
 
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Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Monkey
Posts: 56,048
Jesus existed, sure, but the stories about her became very garbled over time and retelling and mistranslations and mistakes. The historical Jesus was a hardboiled detective using her wits, guts, and fists to solve crimes in ancient Persia while also being a single mother of two. And this was this one time she was staying at an elegant country house party weekend and the duchess was strangled to death but only Jesus was clever enough to figure out the duchess strangled herself to throw off suspicion that it was the duchess who stole the duchess's emerald necklace from herself because she was being blackmailed by the duchess under the threat that she would reveal her own involvement in the crime of blackmailing herself to steal the emeralds! What a tangled web the duchess weaved when first she practiced to redundantly fractal-recursive plot against herself redundantly also again! But trust St Luke to screw up the story and change it to shepherds or fishermen or whatever the hell instead.
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