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Tags science humor , Solar panels , Solar power

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Old 25th May 2014, 01:15 PM   #1
Dorian Gray
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Not Much Difference Between This Satirical Piece And What Ignorant People Believe

The National Report:
Solar Panels Drain the Sun's Energy

Quote:
snip

This week, a scientific research facility in Wyoming made a startling discovery that is certain to change the way millions of Americans look at the environmentalism movement, after they found conclusive evidence that solar panels not only convert the sun’s energy into usable energy, but that they are also draining the sun of its own energy, possibly with catastrophic consequences far worse than global warming.

Scientists at the Wyoming Institute of Technology, a privately-owned think tank located in Cheyenne, Wyoming, discovered that energy radiated from the sun isn’t merely captured in solar panels, but that energy is directly physically drawn from the sun by those panels, in a process they refer to as “forced photovoltaic drainage.”

“Put into laymen’s terms, the solar panels capture the sun’s energy, but pull on the sun over time, forcing more energy to be released than the sun is actually producing,” WIT claims in a scientific white paper published on Wednesday. “Imagine a waterfall, dumping water. But you aren’t catching the water in buckets, but rather sucking it in with a vacuum cleaner. Eventually, you’re going to suck in so much water that you drain the river above that waterfall completely.”

snip
Unfortunately, this type of thing often gets filtered through the moronic masses and freaks out a certain percentage of the people. Really sad.
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Old 25th May 2014, 01:24 PM   #2
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I laughed out loud when I read 'draining the sun'.
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Old 25th May 2014, 02:25 PM   #3
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WAKE UP SHEEPLE!!! Not only are solar panels draining the Sun, wind farms are draining the wind! Soon, all the air will be static! You won't even be able to breathe, we'll all suffocate! DESTROY WIND FARMS NOW BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE!!!
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Old 25th May 2014, 02:50 PM   #4
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Oh NOES!! We is draining the Sun!!!!

This article is worth a few laughs:

http://nationalreport.net/solar-pane...y-experts-say/

Quote:
>This week, a scientific research facility in Wyoming made a startling discovery that is certain to change the way millions of Americans look at the environmentalism movement, after they found conclusive evidence that solar panels not only convert the sun’s energy into usable energy, but that they are also draining the sun of its own energy, possibly with catastrophic consequences far worse than global warming. - See more at: http://nationalreport.net/solar-pane....NHU6yYdo.dpuf
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Old 25th May 2014, 02:54 PM   #5
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Rats! I just posted the same article in another new thread.

We better shut down those solar farms. And I guess that hydroelectric damns are draining the ocean too!
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Old 25th May 2014, 03:02 PM   #6
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I can hear solar panel repairman now : "Well, there's your problem, see. Forced photovoltaic drainage, happens a lot on this model. Sure, we can fix it, but it's gonna cost you ..."
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Old 25th May 2014, 03:12 PM   #7
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Unbelievably, there does appear to be a Wyoming institute of Technology (unless this is a very sophisticated scam). What does this say about the National Report if people there actually believe it? And that they are highlighting Palin and Cruz?

Last edited by Giordano; 25th May 2014 at 03:15 PM.
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Old 25th May 2014, 03:13 PM   #8
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Quote:
"Put into laymen’s terms, the solar panels capture the sun’s energy, but pull on the sun over time, forcing more energy to be released than the sun is actually producing,” WIT claims in a scientific white paper published on Wednesday. “Imagine a waterfall, dumping water. But you aren’t catching the water in buckets, but rather sucking it in with a vacuum cleaner. Eventually, you’re going to suck in so much water that you drain the river above that waterfall completely.”
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Old 25th May 2014, 03:15 PM   #9
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Ahem.

Quote:
National Report (nationalreport.net) is a satirical website devoted to often subtle parodies of real news which convince the unwary.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/National_Report
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Old 25th May 2014, 03:20 PM   #10
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Originally Posted by AdMan View Post
That explains it.
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Old 25th May 2014, 03:25 PM   #11
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I think they like to suck in people pre-oriented to think GW is some sort of political, new world order thing. Sort of an Onion light.

Solar panels do suck up some of the Sun's light and reduce the thermal heating that would otherwise occur which is why solar panels that are under full load are cooler than ones that aren't connected. Which, BTW, is one of the ways you locate defective panels. Thermal imaging makes it a snap.

Of course the electricity generated is also turned into heat, usually virtually simultaneously.
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Old 25th May 2014, 03:39 PM   #12
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Originally Posted by Subduction Zone View Post
This article is worth a few laughs:

http://nationalreport.net/solar-pane...y-experts-say/
I read that in Morgan Freeman's voice.
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Old 25th May 2014, 05:47 PM   #13
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Originally Posted by Giordano View Post
Unbelievably, there does appear to be a Wyoming institute of Technology (unless this is a very sophisticated scam). What does this say about the National Report if people there actually believe it? And that they are highlighting Palin and Cruz?
There is no Wyoming Institute of Technology

The link within the article goes to witscience.org just has a single page that displays a photo claiming to be the WIT, but which has been ripped from wikimedia commons, and is in fact the Rochester Institute of Technology in New York... shown here.



The website witscience.org was only registered 10 days ago

Domain Name:WITSCIENCE.ORG
Domain ID: D172624842-LROR
Creation Date: 2014-05-16T21:05:25Z
Updated Date: 2014-05-16T21:05:26Z
Registry Expiry Date: 2015-05-16T21:05:25Z
Sponsoring Registrar:GoDaddy.com, LLC (R91-LROR)
Sponsoring Registrar IANA ID: 146

There was, however, a Wyoming Technical Institute, which is now called "WyoTech". It is effectively just an Automotive College

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/WyoTech#Fields_of_study
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Old 25th May 2014, 05:57 PM   #14
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Hell, I just figured it recharged itself at night when it was turned off.
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Old 25th May 2014, 06:14 PM   #15
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Yes, as pointed out above, it's all satire.
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Old 25th May 2014, 06:54 PM   #16
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But in so much as the solar panels work in the infra-red range, they will be soaking up the heat from the atmospheric CO2. And therefor, sucking up all them AGWs.

Now excuse me while I go register my new company, "Greener Panels".
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Old 25th May 2014, 08:27 PM   #17
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Originally Posted by shemp View Post
WAKE UP SHEEPLE!!! Not only are solar panels draining the Sun, wind farms are draining the wind! Soon, all the air will be static! You won't even be able to breathe, we'll all suffocate! DESTROY WIND FARMS NOW BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE!!!
You're being ridiculous. It's GRAVITY that we are draining at an alarming rate. Do you know how much gravity is consumed when a rocket somewhere in the world launches another useless satellite? Not to mention all the skyscrapers. Did you know that Taipei 101 consumes as much gravity in ONE DAY as the ENTIRE country of France did in the decade from 1710-1720? Before too long, we will struggle to merely keep our feet on the ground. My God...won't someone think of the HOVERING CHILDREN.
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Old 25th May 2014, 08:45 PM   #18
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Originally Posted by FenerFan View Post
My God...won't someone think of the HOVERING CHILDREN.
Kids these days will do anything to get high....
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Old 25th May 2014, 09:05 PM   #19
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But how will we be able to wind up the sundials if this is happening?
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Old 25th May 2014, 11:40 PM   #20
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(I wish I could think of something witty to add too!)

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Old 26th May 2014, 12:42 AM   #21
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Originally Posted by casebro View Post
But in so much as the solar panels work in the infra-red range, they will be soaking up the heat from the atmospheric CO2. And therefor, sucking up all them AGWs.

Now excuse me while I go register my new company, "Greener Panels".
Interesting idea. Absorb IR. But how long can you go with the lowest bandgap germanium?

Can you absorb the longwave IR that gets reflected by CO2?
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Old 26th May 2014, 02:48 AM   #22
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Stop Photovoltaic! Ban Dihydrogenmonoxide! Think of the Children!
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Old 26th May 2014, 03:45 AM   #23
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cool, can't wait until the first AGW denier brings that up. the GOP advisers surely released already memos pointing out that it is satire and they should not use it in their speeches. i wonder how many will anyway
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Old 26th May 2014, 04:18 AM   #24
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How to tell if an unknown site is satire: Check out a few of the other stories it carries. If they some are obvious rubbish then it is either a satire or a woo site. Either way do not take it seriously and quote from it. This is just a basic test which would show that the site in the OP is such a site. Yet many people who should know better fail to do this basic test.
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Old 26th May 2014, 05:29 AM   #25
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Originally Posted by jj View Post
Interesting idea. Absorb IR. But how long can you go with the lowest bandgap germanium?

Can you absorb the longwave IR that gets reflected by CO2?
Yeah, I was tongue in cheek. I think they mostly work in the UV range NOW. But they are getting broad band.

But hmmm, a Peltier system does use ambient heat, not light.
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Old 26th May 2014, 05:36 AM   #26
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Originally Posted by FenerFan View Post
You're being ridiculous. It's GRAVITY that we are draining at an alarming rate. Do you know how much gravity is consumed when a rocket somewhere in the world launches another useless satellite? Not to mention all the skyscrapers. Did you know that Taipei 101 consumes as much gravity in ONE DAY as the ENTIRE country of France did in the decade from 1710-1720? Before too long, we will struggle to merely keep our feet on the ground. My God...won't someone think of the HOVERING CHILDREN.
Though the tides are still rising and waning, I think we have to look into the geological proxies to see how much they are effecting them.

It's probably not the off sets of the tall structures we are building since the 1860s, it's the mass of CO2 we have out into the atmosphere. Though the graph of tall structures vs AGW is a proven link. Probably because the occupants of the higher floors exhale their CO2 directly into the higher atmosphere.

Or are you an Anti Gravity Wonk, a denier?
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Old 26th May 2014, 05:42 AM   #27
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Originally Posted by rjh01 View Post
How to tell if an unknown site is satire: Check out a few of the other stories it carries. If they some are obvious rubbish then it is either a satire or a woo site. Either way do not take it seriously and quote from it. This is just a basic test which would show that the site in the OP is such a site. Yet many people who should know better fail to do this basic test.
indeed, I often see people link to dailymail and foxnews anyway.
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Old 26th May 2014, 06:06 AM   #28
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Originally Posted by FenerFan View Post
You're being ridiculous. It's GRAVITY that we are draining at an alarming rate. Do you know how much gravity is consumed when a rocket somewhere in the world launches another useless satellite? Not to mention all the skyscrapers. Did you know that Taipei 101 consumes as much gravity in ONE DAY as the ENTIRE country of France did in the decade from 1710-1720? Before too long, we will struggle to merely keep our feet on the ground. My God...won't someone think of the HOVERING CHILDREN.
Ha. Ha. How ridiculous can you get . . . everyone knows there there are eleven years between 1710 and 1720.
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Old 26th May 2014, 06:22 AM   #29
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Not sure if the comments were genuine, but there was one from someone saying that draining the sun was like the claim that wind turbines could stop the wind.

Now, questions of scale apart, wind turbines do take energy out of the wind, so it isn't entirely unreasonable to speculate that taking a lot of wind energy might affect the wind (someone should be able to calculate how many turbines it would take to significantly affect the weather - probably beyond our capabilities to build).
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Old 26th May 2014, 06:52 AM   #30
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Originally Posted by dlorde View Post
Not sure if the comments were genuine, but there was one from someone saying that draining the sun was like the claim that wind turbines could stop the wind.

Now, questions of scale apart, wind turbines do take energy out of the wind, so it isn't entirely unreasonable to speculate that taking a lot of wind energy might affect the wind (someone should be able to calculate how many turbines it would take to significantly affect the weather - probably beyond our capabilities to build).
That's an easy one. The air flow is represented by a column of air several miles high and maybe a hundred miles wide. So the result of having a chain of wind mills one half mile apart and 50 miles long would be ... quick calculation ... DAMN LITTLE.
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Old 26th May 2014, 07:09 AM   #31
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On a more serious note, if a wind farm would suck power out of the wind to any major degree I can only imagine how much energy a large forest would suck up. The air around forests must be totally still if the theory is correct.

Which it ain't.
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Old 26th May 2014, 02:43 PM   #32
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Quote:
shemp
Soon, all the air will be static! You won't even be able to breathe, we'll all suffocate!

A few weeks ago I was sent on an errand, a box of tea bags. Now you might think it's a long way down the road to The Dog and Partridge, but that's just peanuts to Tesco's. So feeling the onset of dehydration I decided it was best to follow prevailing wisdom, consume liquids.
I arrived home about 100 O'clock, bagless, keyless, cut hands and the knees scraped out of me trousers. I had to waken the the Kraken. I could feel her giving me the gamma rays through the front door. Anyway I explained the laws of physics regarding a moving mass of air. I was walking at a constant speed of two miles per hour with a tail wind of exactly two miles per hour and I forgot to zigzag. I was suffocating in a cloud of my own exhalation. Oxygen deprivation and carbon dioxide poisoning you see. Hence the collapsing, knee grazing behavior.

Unfortunately. She is more wise in the ways if science than I thought. Fortunately: she was only wearing slippers, the bruises are mostly gone but the ribs are still a bit sore.

Last edited by George; 26th May 2014 at 02:53 PM. Reason: Trying to get the quote proper.
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Old 26th May 2014, 05:20 PM   #33
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Originally Posted by dlorde View Post
Now, questions of scale apart, wind turbines do take energy out of the wind, so it isn't entirely unreasonable to speculate that taking a lot of wind energy might affect the wind (someone should be able to calculate how many turbines it would take to significantly affect the weather - probably beyond our capabilities to build).
Any obstacle, including a forest can effect the wind, not just slowing it, but more importantly cause a separation of the flow, which can lead to heavily increased turbulence. The resulting wind speed gradients across the rotor lead to high fatigue loads particularly on the yaw system.

Originally Posted by Gawdzilla View Post
On a more serious note, if a wind farm would suck power out of the wind to any major degree I can only imagine how much energy a large forest would suck up.
The amount of energy removed from the wind is almost the same as the power generated from the windmill, plus the heat from the pressure change. But t's not just a reduction in wind energy, it's also how it changes the wind that matter to windmills. But even a stand of trees will remove energy from the wind. This is useful since windrows will not only protect orchards from wind, but actually warm the air, preventing frost or even freeze damage, if the wind blows all night.

Forests certainly warm the air and slow the wind, they also can add moisture to the air, further changing the characteristics of the wind. Forests can even create weather. there are entire fields of study about this.
Originally Posted by Gawdzilla View Post
The air around forests must be totally still if the theory is correct.

Which it ain't.
What theory you are speaking of is a mystery, but certainly forests both disrupt the wind, as well as slowing it. It's well know to the agriculture. It would be ignorant to think a windmill or a forest would completely stop the wind.

Even a solid mountain a mile high won't stop the wind.

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Old 26th May 2014, 05:43 PM   #34
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Just gonna put this in here and back away slowly.

http://img.fark.net/images/cache/850...Q&f=1401681600
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