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Tags flat earth conspiracies , flat earthers

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Old 11th October 2017, 07:11 PM   #1
JoeBentley
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There are no forest on Earth / The Devils Tower is a giant petrified tree stump

Flat-Earthers Have a Wild New Theory About Forests

Quote:
‘No Forests on Flat Earth’ is an incredible new theory. Its claim is grand, counterintuitive, and beautiful: we were lied to; our flat earth has no forests.
https://www.theatlantic.com/science/...uthers/499322/

Long story short in the past "forests" were made up of gigantic, kilometer high trees. What we have now are just basically small patches of shrubs.

Oh and the Devils Tower (below) in Wyoming is not really a 1,267 feet (386 m) high laccolithic butte composed of igneous rock as us sheeple have been lead to believe. It (and many other buttes and mesas) is a petrified stump of one of those ancient giant trees.

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Old 11th October 2017, 07:23 PM   #2
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Oooo! I heard about this one but I forgot about it. None of its proponents ever answered how the trees came to be petrified.
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Old 11th October 2017, 07:49 PM   #3
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I'm struggling to understand the conspiracy theory, can you flesh it out a little more?

and BTW that is an impressive piece of rock.
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Old 11th October 2017, 08:19 PM   #4
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Originally Posted by novaphile View Post
I'm struggling to understand the conspiracy theory, can you flesh it out a little more?

and BTW that is an impressive piece of rock.
The skinny is, that mesas & mountains are petrified trees. There was a huge cataclysm that deforested the earth, & all we are left with are a bunch of bushes.

It ties into flat earth by proving "THEY" know the truth about the cataclysm (people were around for it. It's happened in like the 2nd-3rd age of mankind. We're on the 5th) & trees of that size can only grow "up".

At least that's what was told to me.
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Old 11th October 2017, 09:19 PM   #5
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There's also a Godbothering angle.

It's babbling nutjobbery of the highest order.

I believe this is the originator of it. Be warned, you will not get this 80 minutes back.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UHkiZNT3cyE
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Old 11th October 2017, 10:35 PM   #6
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I can't lower my IQ far enough for this one.
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Old 12th October 2017, 01:40 AM   #7
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Complete bollocks. Everyone knows it used to hold one of the Lamps of the Valar.

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Old 12th October 2017, 11:23 AM   #8
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Snopes is on the case.
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Old 12th October 2017, 03:15 PM   #9
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Originally Posted by Dave Rogers View Post
Complete bollocks. Everyone knows it used to hold one of the Lamps of the Valar.

Dave
Nah, it a secret landing place for Aliens.....


Has "Close Encounters" been forgotten already?

BTW every summer they have a special showing of Close Encounters at Devil's Tower National Monument....
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Old 12th October 2017, 03:33 PM   #10
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I recommend that all watch this movie. It's a fascinating work of art into another person's fantasy realm. It gives you a peaceful, entranced feeling similar to a chill nature documentary.

Here is a good English dub of the Russian original:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fFrLkNrATGA

Reminder: The person who made this video was dead serious.
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Old 14th October 2017, 03:12 AM   #11
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Originally Posted by JoeBentley View Post
Flat-Earthers Have a Wild New Theory About Forests



https://www.theatlantic.com/science/...uthers/499322/

Long story short in the past "forests" were made up of gigantic, kilometer high trees. What we have now are just basically small patches of shrubs.

Oh and the Devils Tower (below) in Wyoming is not really a 1,267 feet (386 m) high laccolithic butte composed of igneous rock as us sheeple have been lead to believe. It (and many other buttes and mesas) is a petrified stump of one of those ancient giant trees.

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikiped...Sep03_exif.jpg

That big stump reminds me of the movie Avatar.
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Old 14th October 2017, 10:45 AM   #12
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Originally Posted by Trebuchet View Post
Snopes is on the case.

So it turns out that flat-earthers, the very people who pride themselves on not being gulled by supposed scientific dogma are in actual fact the most gullible people in the whole wide (oblate spheroid) world? Huh.
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Old 14th October 2017, 10:51 AM   #13
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So (rule of so), the stump of a kilometer high tree is 386m. That's going to be a REALLY funny-looking tree.
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Old 14th October 2017, 11:21 AM   #14
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Originally Posted by Trebuchet View Post
So (rule of so), the stump of a kilometer high tree is 386m. That's going to be a REALLY funny-looking tree.
I wonder if the strength of any known wood could actually support such a structure?

Why would the square-cube law NOT be limiting to tree height? The limiting factor is generally assumed to be energy required to draw water up the trunk, which is linearly proportional to height. Water movement appears to be one of the big limiting factors in tree growth. It appears on earth that 120-130m is about the maximum height of a tree. It gets harder and harder to get water up to the top.

I think they'd have to evoke 'lesser gravity in the old earth scenario'.
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Old 14th October 2017, 11:54 AM   #15
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Originally Posted by 332nd View Post
Oooo! I heard about this one but I forgot about it. None of its proponents ever answered how the trees came to be petrified.
They were frightened byf giant Beavers?
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Old 14th October 2017, 05:13 PM   #16
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Originally Posted by Captain_Swoop View Post
They were frightened byf giant Beavers?
I hope none of them were fruit or nut trees - it would be like an impact zone.
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Old 14th October 2017, 05:44 PM   #17
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Everyone has forgotten Paul Bunyan and his blue ox, Babe.
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Old 14th October 2017, 06:41 PM   #18
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Originally Posted by Hans View Post
I wonder if the strength of any known wood could actually support such a structure?

Why would the square-cube law NOT be limiting to tree height? The limiting factor is generally assumed to be energy required to draw water up the trunk, which is linearly proportional to height. Water movement appears to be one of the big limiting factors in tree growth. It appears on earth that 120-130m is about the maximum height of a tree. It gets harder and harder to get water up to the top.
Yep. This "Stump" would already be many magnitudes taller than any tree could possibly grow. The particularly large trees we have now (Giant Sequoias, Coast Redwoods, Mountain Ash, etc) already get to 90-115m, so we're probably seeing trees right now at pretty much the practical real world limit.
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Old 14th October 2017, 07:13 PM   #19
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The Blackfeet had a whimsy that Devil's Tower is the stump of a giant tree. When you look at the thing itself and recall that notion, it makes you go "gulp!"

Maybe the flatters heard of that Blackfoot bedtime story.
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Old 15th October 2017, 06:28 AM   #20
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Originally Posted by sackett View Post
The Blackfeet had a whimsy that Devil's Tower is the stump of a giant tree. When you look at the thing itself and recall that notion, it makes you go "gulp!"

Maybe the flatters heard of that Blackfoot bedtime story.
You have mistaken the Blackfeet with perhaps the Kiowa tribe, and their belief concerning Devils Tower was

Quote:
The Kiowa call Devils Tower "Aloft on a Rock" and "Tree Rock." The oral histories of the Kiowa people link Tree Rock with their astronomical knowledge.
https://www.nps.gov/deto/learn/histo...ite.htm#Lakota
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Old 16th October 2017, 02:42 PM   #21
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Originally Posted by JoeBentley View Post
Flat-Earthers Have a Wild New Theory About Forests



https://www.theatlantic.com/science/...uthers/499322/

Long story short in the past "forests" were made up of gigantic, kilometer high trees. What we have now are just basically small patches of shrubs.

Oh and the Devils Tower (below) in Wyoming is not really a 1,267 feet (386 m) high laccolithic butte composed of igneous rock as us sheeple have been lead to believe. It (and many other buttes and mesas) is a petrified stump of one of those ancient giant trees.

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikiped...Sep03_exif.jpg
Re Devil's Tower: The damn thing does look like a giant tree stump, and 9/11 truthers have taught me that whatever something looks like, is what it is (e.g the collapse of Building 7 looks like a controlled demolition (if you don't look real close), so it was a controlled demolition). Since Devil's tower is a tree stump by that impeccable logic, I can marvel at not only how big the tree was, but at how big Paul Bunyan must have been to cut it down. Of course, I do have to wonder what the heck happened to the rest of the tree. It must have been a hell of a job to cut it up and haul it away.

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Old 16th October 2017, 03:04 PM   #22
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I wonder if it made a sound when it fell, since no one was around to hear it.
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Old 18th October 2017, 11:28 AM   #23
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Come on, we all know the Devil's Tower is made out of Mashed Potatoes.....
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Old 20th October 2017, 10:34 AM   #24
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Only if we're old enough.
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Old 20th October 2017, 10:51 AM   #25
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I wonder if there are Flat-Earthers who would believe that all forests were created by holographic projectors...

...pretty sure I could find this in their lair...
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Old 21st October 2017, 06:28 AM   #26
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Originally Posted by Argumemnon View Post
I wonder if it made a sound when it fell, since no one was around to hear it.


I wonder where all the wood went. Using the posted height of 1,267 feet, and estimating the width to be similar, we can determine an estimate of the volume of the tower, as the volume of a cylinder, pi*r^2*h. I calculate it to be just over 1.5 billion cubic feet, which is about 44.7 million cubic meters.

I found this document:

https://www.fs.fed.us/nrs/pubs/jrnl/...uppold_001.pdf

Which indicates in figure 1 that total world production of hardwood lumber has varied between about 95 to 120 million cubic meters per year. So, this stump alone would be about one third to one half of our total world production, for one year. How much would the whole tree be?
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Old 21st October 2017, 09:58 AM   #27
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Originally Posted by CORed View Post
Re Devil's Tower: The damn thing does look like a giant tree stump, and 9/11 truthers have taught me that whatever something looks like, is what it is (e.g the collapse of Building 7 looks like a controlled demolition (if you don't look real close), so it was a controlled demolition). Since Devil's tower is a tree stump by that impeccable logic, I can marvel at not only how big the tree was, but at how big Paul Bunyan must have been to cut it down. Of course, I do have to wonder what the heck happened to the rest of the tree. It must have been a hell of a job to cut it up and haul it away.
Be fair! I'm no biologist, but in my informal observations, the parts that are cut off above the stump decompose more quickly than the stump.

I mean, you don't want to make the "Devil's Tower is a tree stump" crowd look like morons here. Apply the principle of charity and try to cast them in the least loony light.
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Old 21st October 2017, 10:02 AM   #28
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delete. Misread.

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Old 1st November 2017, 11:34 AM   #29
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Originally Posted by Hans View Post
I wonder if the strength of any known wood could actually support such a structure?
Gopher wood of course, excellent for building giant ships btw.
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Old 21st November 2017, 01:38 AM   #30
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Originally Posted by Captain_Swoop View Post
They were frightened byf giant Beavers?
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Old 21st November 2017, 01:45 AM   #31
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Originally Posted by Horatius View Post
I wonder where all the wood went. Using the posted height of 1,267 feet, and estimating the width to be similar, we can determine an estimate of the volume of the tower, as the volume of a cylinder, pi*r^2*h. I calculate it to be just over 1.5 billion cubic feet, which is about 44.7 million cubic meters.

I found this document:

https://www.fs.fed.us/nrs/pubs/jrnl/...uppold_001.pdf

Which indicates in figure 1 that total world production of hardwood lumber has varied between about 95 to 120 million cubic meters per year. So, this stump alone would be about one third to one half of our total world production, for one year. How much would the whole tree be?
How much wood would the whole tree be if the whole tree could be wood?

The Close Encounters viewing sounds kinda cool. I wonder if it's in the "box canyon"?
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Old 21st November 2017, 11:42 AM   #32
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Does this trend towards moronic theories bottom out at some point? I'm hoping it's just a hurdle mankind has to get over instead of a new fixture.
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Old 21st November 2017, 03:52 PM   #33
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Originally Posted by Imhotep View Post
Does this trend towards moronic theories bottom out at some point? I'm hoping it's just a hurdle mankind has to get over instead of a new fixture.
The stupidity has increased at an exponential rate since the advent of the internet.
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Old 21st November 2017, 04:10 PM   #34
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Originally Posted by JoeBentley View Post
Yep. This "Stump" would already be many magnitudes taller than any tree could possibly grow. The particularly large trees shrubs we have now (Giant Sequoias, Coast Redwoods, Mountain Ash, etc) already get to 90-115m, so we're probably seeing trees shrubs right now at pretty much the practical real world limit.
And all of these years living right in the center of the largest Coast Redwoods alive on the planet, I must now tell strangers to these parts that no longer do I live in a beautiful forest of spectacular trees; I now live in a thicket of shrubs.
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Old 22nd November 2017, 09:19 AM   #35
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Originally Posted by bknight View Post
The stupidity has increased at an exponential rate since the advent of the internet.
Maybe this stuff has always been around, but now the true believers just have more of an ability to network and spread the crazy.

What are some good historical CTs that pre-date the internet? Off the top of my head:

Loch Ness Monster
Yeti / Bigfoot
UFOs
Superstitions, like salt over the shoulder or black cat etc.
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Old 23rd November 2017, 07:11 AM   #36
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Originally Posted by bknight View Post
The stupidity has increased at an exponential rate since the advent of the internet.
Called it almost two decades ago:
Originally Posted by Harlan Ellison
Goddammit! The world is just filling up with more and more idiots! And the computer is giving them access to the world! They're spreading their stupidity! At least they were contained before—now they're on the loose everywhere!
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Old 23rd November 2017, 07:29 AM   #37
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Originally Posted by sts60 View Post
Combine access with confirmation bias and suddenly we are in a world full of sticky idiocy.
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Old 23rd November 2017, 07:34 AM   #38
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Originally Posted by LSSBB View Post
Combine access with confirmation bias and suddenly we are in a world full of sticky idiocy.
Add active disinformation from plutocrat-funded "AstroTurf" groups and Russian professional trolls and pets, and stir thoroughly for that extra awfulness.
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Old 24th November 2017, 09:35 AM   #39
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Originally Posted by sts60 View Post
Yes the fruit cakes were once limited to 'letters to the editor' and those blue mimeograph sheets and now they can self publish, make youtube videos and of course bother people on social media and with websites/blogs.

A chaotic explosion of nuttiness
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Old 24th November 2017, 10:43 AM   #40
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It's the internet's greatest achievement and its greatest sin, removing geographical factors and 90% plus of "sunk cost" into getting ideas out there.
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