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Old 7th May 2009, 05:22 AM   #1
Cainkane1
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When did you choose to be heterosexual?

I was at my very aged mothers home one day when I overheard Rev Jimmy Swaggard say that we choose our sexual preferences. I'm straight but I never remember a time when I sat down and said to myself "hmmm I wonder which gender I want to be sexually attracted to"? Hey maybe I can have fun with my own gender? Nah I'll just go with most people and be attracted to women. Yup thats what I'm gonna do.

Did anyone in here choose who they want to be with? I didn't. My hormones kicked in and it was women all the way.
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Old 7th May 2009, 05:40 AM   #2
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Choose??? Maybe this should be moved to the Humor section.
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Old 7th May 2009, 06:01 AM   #3
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Um, I like girls, tried a boy, knew for sure I liked girls.
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Old 7th May 2009, 06:08 AM   #4
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On a college field trip I did try snogging a very attractive girl and we even went on to ...er... heavy petting but it just didn't turn me on so I have to admit it's a mystery to me why you straight blokes choose to have sex with females. I assume you were brainwashed by all these different-sex marriages that are forced on us?
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Old 7th May 2009, 06:10 AM   #5
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I was 5. Watched an episode of Charlie's Angels. There was never a doubt from that day forward.
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Old 7th May 2009, 06:16 AM   #6
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Originally Posted by Darat View Post
On a college field trip I did try snogging a very attractive girl and we even went on to ...er... heavy petting but it just didn't turn me on so I have to admit it's a mystery to me why you straight blokes choose to have sex with females. I assume you were brainwashed by all these different-sex marriages that are forced on us?
On a serious note you didn't choose to be gay did you? It just happened didn't it? I mean there was never a time when you didn't care one way or another and say you know what? I think I'll just be gay. I didn't choose to be straight it just happened.
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Old 7th May 2009, 06:22 AM   #7
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Quite seriously - I can never remember a time since I learned to label certain feelings "sexual attraction" that they involved females. It's not that I find women physically revolting or even unattractive, some women are drop dead gorgeous but there is simply no sexual attraction.
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Old 7th May 2009, 06:29 AM   #8
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Originally Posted by Darat View Post
Quite seriously - I can never remember a time since I learned to label certain feelings "sexual attraction" that they involved females. It's not that I find women physically revolting or even unattractive, some women are drop dead gorgeous but there is simply no sexual attraction.
I quite agree. From a heterosexual standpoint, I can still easily point out the men that I consider extremely handsome. However, there's no sexual response or urge involved. And I have no evidence that I ever made a decision to not be sexually attracted to the masculine gender.

Perhaps Jimmy Swaggard DID choose, however? Maybe he's hiding his homosexual urges, and instead chose to overcome his distaste for women?
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Old 7th May 2009, 06:59 AM   #9
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Originally Posted by Drudgewire View Post
I was 5. Watched an episode of Charlie's Angels. There was never a doubt from that day forward.
For me it was "The Secret of Isis".
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Old 7th May 2009, 07:09 AM   #10
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About the time the girls lost their cooties, I went hetero.
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Old 7th May 2009, 07:15 AM   #11
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Originally Posted by Drudgewire View Post
I was 5. Watched an episode of Charlie's Angels. There was never a doubt from that day forward.
Originally Posted by godless dave View Post
For me it was "The Secret of Isis".

Playing "you show me yours and I´ll show you mine" with two girls of the neighborhood (quite long before puberty) in a changing room of a swimming pool is the first memory still available.
Wouldn´t call it "choice" that I really liked it, though.
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Old 7th May 2009, 07:16 AM   #12
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Originally Posted by quarky View Post
About the time the girls lost their cooties, I went hetero.
I think the girls lost their cooties long before I lost mine.

I went hetero as soon as the girls would start giving me the time of day. Until then, I was just as aspiring hetero
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Old 7th May 2009, 07:20 AM   #13
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Soon after I "chose" to breathe, I guess........
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Old 7th May 2009, 07:32 AM   #14
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I think many parents want to believe it's a choice because that absolves them from feeling they are responsible for their child being gay. Even though being an out gay person is easier now then it was even 20 years ago, it can still be a difficult life, and that's something I think even the most open-minded parents want to avoid.
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Old 7th May 2009, 09:13 AM   #15
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Originally Posted by Drudgewire View Post
I was 5. Watched an episode of Charlie's Angels. There was never a doubt from that day forward.
Yeah, that's pretty much it. I recall getting crushes on girls back in first grade, and "feeling funny" when looking at my kindergarten teacher's nylon-clad thighs as she sang songs to us.

There's just nothing sexually attractive about a male's physique to me, nor is his face pretty; I don't long to stare into his limpid eyes.
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Old 7th May 2009, 10:18 AM   #16
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Nobody told me there was any choice available.
And it sure didn't feel like there was.


I was never given any choice about which side of the road to drive on either.
But that doesn't mean it's genetic.
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Old 7th May 2009, 11:20 AM   #17
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Originally Posted by Tricky View Post
Mod WarningBecause of the nature of this thread, it was going to get into problems with Rule 9 over in "Social Issues", so rather than try to mod all those posts I've moved it to "Community". We still have limits even here though, so don't take that as an invitation to go over the top.
Posted By:Tricky
Gee I wish this hadn't happened.
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Old 7th May 2009, 12:26 PM   #18
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I chose to be heterosexual several times in my late teens and early twenties. It never took, though.
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Old 7th May 2009, 12:30 PM   #19
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I think I chose to be heterosexual in the 80s- right around the same time that Jimmy Swaggart chose to pick up prostitutes in motel parking lots.
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Old 7th May 2009, 12:32 PM   #20
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UK people of my age may understand - I was totally convinced I was heterosexual by Pan's People.
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Old 7th May 2009, 12:52 PM   #21
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I chose to be heterosexual once. Then I sobered up and chose back.
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Old 7th May 2009, 01:01 PM   #22
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The decisive moment was when I stopped playing football with the guys in order to play dodgeball with that girl. I suspect this affected not only my sexuality but also my career.
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Old 7th May 2009, 01:14 PM   #23
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Originally Posted by Cainkane1 View Post
Gee I wish this hadn't happened.
Me neither. You raised a serious issue in the OP. A split would have been better, as it's natural for people to joke about things like this.
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Old 7th May 2009, 01:52 PM   #24
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Like I said, I'm glad to see a few (three, I think?) gay people post their experiences on this thread. It seems that you, along with every exclusively gay person I've ever talked to, say you felt attracted to the same sex as long as they can remember feeling any kind of sexual or romantic attraction at all.

If Swaggart's claim were correct, that would mean all of you are lying.
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Old 7th May 2009, 02:17 PM   #25
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I don't remember ever having to "choose" to be heterosexual. It's not like I walked into a room and suddenly had to pick between a dude and a girl. It doesn't really work like that. For me, it was the factory setting. If circumstances or genetics had been different, then I might be different. But, I've never even had a moment where I looked at another guy and thought "Heyyy...ya know?" No. Never happened.

I enjoy curves and boobs, as if I - or anyone else for that matter - needs to justify what they enjoy in a partner no matter what their preferences are.
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Old 7th May 2009, 02:59 PM   #26
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I fell irredeemably in love with a boy when I was 9. And that's how far I remember it.
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Old 7th May 2009, 03:01 PM   #27
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If you press a "homosexuality is a choice" type person with this argument, they will revert to something a little more logical, if stupid.

"homosexual behavior is a choice".

It's not so much that they think people choose to not be gay, it's that they think people that are gay should just not do anything about it. How very enlightened of them.
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Old 7th May 2009, 03:17 PM   #28
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Ever since I was, say, nine or ten years old, I can remember being about equally attracted to males and females. It came very naturally, and involved no choice. In fact, I had these "feelings" even before I knew that they were the same thing as "sexual attraction".
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Old 7th May 2009, 03:17 PM   #29
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I never got a choice. Was I cheated? Can I get a refund somewhere?
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Old 7th May 2009, 03:22 PM   #30
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My mom likes to tell a story about a time the family was gathered around the TV watching the Beverly Hillbillies. I must have been four or five at the time.

Mom (to me): "Would you like to have a granny like that?"

Me: "I'd like to have an Ellie May like that."

So, I guess that's when the switch was flipped.
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Old 7th May 2009, 03:42 PM   #31
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As far as the real experience instead of the pith attempt above:

I remember being about 10 years old and deciding I wanted to be straight. I was aware of the difference at the time and 10 year old version of me didn't want to be gay. I remember being in my bedroom thinking "I hope I'm not". I didn't want the discrimination,
I didn't want the religious implications (xian household), I didn't want the social implications.

By this point in time, there were already ample signs in my thinking that should've tipped me off that I would, in fact, be gay, but I didn't have the ability to recognize this at the time.

Shortly thereafter, puberty hit. It happened young for me, I actually hit my adult height at age 13. All of the sudden, and before most all of my peers, I was a ball of hormones interested only in boys and for fully two more years, I still didn't get it. I didn't stare at girls, I didn't think about girls during (*ahem) personal time, and I didn't think I was gay.

I had a rough ride through middle school in general and very gradually coming to the realization that the continual barrage of homophobic slurs and jokes applied to me didn't help.

By late middle school or early high school I had finally admitted it to myself, but was rooted firmly in the closet. Instead of doing the more self destructive tactic of proving I wasn't by being the biggest homophobic piece of **** in the school, I took on left wing clubs and causes including the schools first attempt at something Gay-Straight-Alliance related, though there wasn't a single out person in it. I grew up just 6 miles from the rather liberal city of Seattle, but being on an island populated mostly by the rich that didn't want to be too accessible to the city made it effectively a non entity.

It took until college for me to be out to anyone else. I wish I had worked up the courage sooner. There was choice involved in that and it had a lot to do with the scared 5th grader that didn't want to have to accept it later.
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Old 7th May 2009, 03:47 PM   #32
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I think I knew when, while watching Gilligan's Island, I couldn't take my eyes off of Mary Ann.
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Old 7th May 2009, 03:49 PM   #33
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The first time I met tkingdoll, I just knew that guys weren't for me.
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Old 7th May 2009, 08:12 PM   #34
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Originally Posted by Cainkane1 View Post
When did you choose to be heterosexual?
It wasn't a choice.
Quote:
I overheard Rev Jimmy Swaggard say that we choose our sexual preferences
Ah, I see, you give his utterances weight.

Care to buy a bridge from me near a major US city?

DR
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Old 25th February 2016, 10:35 PM   #35
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I don't remember any choice involved. Looking at how consciousness utilizes human form in order to continue to experience this universe, procreation is the way forward so choice or not, men and women having sex has been the manner of continuing that way forward...
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Old 25th February 2016, 11:04 PM   #36
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Originally Posted by Cainkane1 View Post
Gee I wish this hadn't happened.
What a coincidence: This is exactly what I said about being heterosexual.
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Old 25th February 2016, 11:10 PM   #37
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I was going to guess that I realized my orientation around age 10, but then remembered my thoughts about Emma Peel on the Avengers TV show, looked up the dates, and realized it must have been when I was a few years younger than 10.

I am very amused by the right wing concept that people choose their sexual orientation. I don't recall it ever being a choice for me. I can understand that there are a variety of orientations between the extremes, and that people may thus indulge in different aspects of their own specific orientation at different times. But to choose the orientation itself? Silly! Given my own brain chemistry, I really have trouble understanding why male bodies would be attractive sexually to anyone, especially women. All these years later I remain convinced my wife is faking her interest in mine.

Last edited by Giordano; 25th February 2016 at 11:18 PM.
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Old 25th February 2016, 11:30 PM   #38
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Originally Posted by Giordano View Post
All these years later I remain convinced my wife is faking her interest in mine.
Oh yeah.

I'd be the biggest lezzer on the planet if I were a girl.
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Old 25th February 2016, 11:32 PM   #39
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Originally Posted by quarky View Post
About the time the girls lost their cooties, I went hetero.
*sniff*

A quarky post!

His legacy lives on.
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Old 25th February 2016, 11:39 PM   #40
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Originally Posted by Drudgewire View Post
I was 5. Watched an episode of Charlie's Angels. There was never a doubt from that day forward.
I had the same moment when I went to see "The Golden Voyage of Sinbad" starring Caroline Munro. That, and falling in love with my third grade teacher Mrs. Miles.
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