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#1 |
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Salem, Oregon
Posts: 17,135
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I Married a woo!
I Married a Woo
Back in 2002, I was going through a divorce with my first wife, and decided to use some of the online find-a-date services in my search for a lady to spend some time with. I settled on match.com, and dated a few women I found there. the third woman I met there was Susan, who ***SPOILER*** I married in 2007. I came close to not even seeing her profile, because, in the match.com search engine, I had almost selected "religious preferences must match." I had stated a religious preference of "none", and Susan had selected "Christian". I thought long and hard before telling the search engine that a match on religious preference was not a must. I was in the middle of a divorce from a Catholic-turned Wiccan, and my Agnosticism had been a thorn in her side for some time. But I figured that, if I could deal with a Catholic/Wiccan, I could deal with an ordinary "Christian." Susan and I started chatting online, the talking by phone, and, eventually, started dating. On one of our first dates, I was driving, and we were waiting at a red light when Susan said "Hey, there's that guy I like so much!" I turned to face her, and saw she was pointing out the car window. I looked in the direction she was pointing, and saw a poster of ... John Edward. A few seconds later, Susan said "Why are you banging your head on the steering wheel?" We drove onward, starting a long conversation about cold reading, and my thoughts on "psychics." Later, the first time I visited Susan's home, I found a book by ... Sylvia Browne. Now, many here would have cut and run at that point, if not earlier. Had I done so, I would have missed out on so much... We often watched John Edward's show, as well as that of James VanPraagh. I found myself answering lots of questions Susan would ask ("See, now how did he know that?"), and we discussed cold and hot reading in some detail. Susan started having her doubts about "psychics", but it wasn't until she caught a show titled "Secrets of the Psychics" that she finally came to the conclusion that a lot of it was fraudulent. I'd like to think that some of our conversations on the topic got her somewhat "on the fence", and that tv show was the last straw that tipped her to the skeptical side. Several years later, it was Susan who insisted that I talk to my Mom about this "Kaz" character who had spoken at her (my Mom's) church. A few years after that, Forumites were saying "You've stopped Kaz - who's next?" When I talked to Susan about it, she said "If you think that these "psychics are really hurting people, stop complaining about it, and do something about it! Stop Sylvia Browne was the result. Not long after that, we married in a non-religious ceremony, on the happiest day of my life. Susan has been my proofreader, my second set of eyes, and my most enthusiastic supporter throughout the SSB project. combine this with the tons of hours I've spent away from her and working on articles, and you'll start to understand how crucial she has been to the site's growth and power. Add to all of this the fact that she has stood by me through the whole stroke business, and quite likely saved my life at least once during it, as well as being instrumental in getting the SSB site back up after it was hijacked, and you should see that, if you have appreciated any of what I have done with my Stop sites, you owe a big "thank you" to my Better Half, a former "woo", for being instrumental in their creation and continuation. I owe her so much more than thanks, and am more happy than I can say that I didn't "cut and run" because we differed on some important things. Thanks, my love, for being all this and so much more to me. |
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Who is "Kaz?" Read about her at www.StopKaz.com. Curious about Sylvia Browne? Read about her at www.StopSylvia.com. Ever wonder "What's the Harm?" with psychics, alternative medicine, etc? |
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#2 |
The Infinitely Prolonged
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Westchester County, NY (when not in space)
Posts: 15,574
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It's a strong testament to your gentlemanliness, that you were able to woo a woo, and turn her into one of your stronger supporters.
You should teach classes on how to be classy and diplomatic, with these things. Or, are you simply a natural who has "no idea" how you manage to do it? |
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WARNING: Phrases in this post may sound meaner than they were intended to be. SkeptiCamp NYC: http://www.skepticampnyc.org/ An open conference on science and skepticism, where you could be a presenter! By the way, my first name is NOT Bowerick!!!! |
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#3 |
Guest
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 12,221
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Who knew you'd woo a woo?
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#4 |
Critical Thinker
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 428
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I say hurrah to Robert for being open-minded enough to see the whole picture of who Susan was, and hurrah to Susan for being smart enough, and open-minded enough, to ask questions about the wooish things and actually think about the answers.
You folks are enough to remind me why I still have faith in humanity. Now I think I need to go pass out in a diabetic coma because that OP was so incredibly sweet! (AwwwwwWWWWwwwwWWW... ![]() |
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You could say to the universe, this is not fair. And the universe would say: Oh, isn't it? Sorry. -Terry Pratchett Gotta kick at the darkness 'til it bleeds daylight. -Bruce Cockburn |
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#5 |
Philosopher
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 7,221
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Wow. Truly wow.
Great story. It's so rare when things click like that and work out so well. You deserve one another. |
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#6 |
Penultimate Amazing
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 10,015
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From what I've read of Susan's efforts, and inferred of her character, it doesn't seem to me that the world would have been better off with "one less woo" in this case.
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#7 |
RSL Acolyte
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 2,982
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You are so well suited to each other! How glad you must be that you didn't check that box indicating religious match was a must.
What a beautiful thing to write. |
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www.stopsylvia.com |
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#8 |
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Salem, Oregon
Posts: 17,135
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Thanks, but I think it's more a testament to Susan's intelligence and open-mindedness.
You should teach classes on how to be classy and diplomatic, with these things.[/quote] ![]()
Originally Posted by Wowbagger
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__________________
Who is "Kaz?" Read about her at www.StopKaz.com. Curious about Sylvia Browne? Read about her at www.StopSylvia.com. Ever wonder "What's the Harm?" with psychics, alternative medicine, etc? |
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#9 |
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Salem, Oregon
Posts: 17,135
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__________________
Who is "Kaz?" Read about her at www.StopKaz.com. Curious about Sylvia Browne? Read about her at www.StopSylvia.com. Ever wonder "What's the Harm?" with psychics, alternative medicine, etc? |
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#10 |
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Salem, Oregon
Posts: 17,135
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__________________
Who is "Kaz?" Read about her at www.StopKaz.com. Curious about Sylvia Browne? Read about her at www.StopSylvia.com. Ever wonder "What's the Harm?" with psychics, alternative medicine, etc? |
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#11 |
The Infinitely Prolonged
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Westchester County, NY (when not in space)
Posts: 15,574
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Woo-hoo!!
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__________________
WARNING: Phrases in this post may sound meaner than they were intended to be. SkeptiCamp NYC: http://www.skepticampnyc.org/ An open conference on science and skepticism, where you could be a presenter! By the way, my first name is NOT Bowerick!!!! |
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#12 |
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Salem, Oregon
Posts: 17,135
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__________________
Who is "Kaz?" Read about her at www.StopKaz.com. Curious about Sylvia Browne? Read about her at www.StopSylvia.com. Ever wonder "What's the Harm?" with psychics, alternative medicine, etc? |
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#13 |
Philosopher
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 7,221
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I have to say that you are one of the most level headed people I've ever met. Just unflappable (well, usually, not always) in the face of hyperbole, exaggeration, anger, screaming and yelling. I could never be as patient as you are with the likes of Browne and her fans; I'd soon be yelling back. You missed a calling as a referee, marriage counsellor, advice columnist or peace broker.
![]() Are you sure you aren't exaggerating your wife's "woo tendencies", though? She may have believed in mediums before you met her but it wasn't as though she regularly visited psychics or practised astrology. It sounds as though she believed in it vaguely but wasn't very involved to start with. I don't want to get personal but maybe the reason woo hasn't been a big problem in your relationship is because it wasn't that big of a roadblock to begin with. And maybe it would have been with someone who was a true believer. |
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#14 |
Muse
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 606
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Susan is as fine a lady as I have ever met. We should all be so lucky (to the extent that searching extensively counts as luck...).
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Woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, I'm pulling over the side of the road to let the ambulance drive by. - Senex "World domination is such an ugly phrase. I prefer to call it world optimization." - Less Wrong You can't make Frodo a Jedi without giving Sauron the Death Star. - Less Wrong |
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#15 |
Master Poster
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 2,382
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What a moving heart-warming story.
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#16 |
Penultimate Amazing
Join Date: Sep 2001
Posts: 32,473
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Yer nothing but a woo-lover!
Hehhe. |
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1. He'd never do that. 2. Okay but he's not currently doing it. 3. Okay but he's not currently technically doing it. 4. Okay but everyone does it. 5. He's doing it, we can't stop him, no point in complaining about it. 6. We all knew he was going to do it which... makes it okay somehow. 7. It's perfectly fine that's he's doing it. |
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#17 |
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Salem, Oregon
Posts: 17,135
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__________________
Who is "Kaz?" Read about her at www.StopKaz.com. Curious about Sylvia Browne? Read about her at www.StopSylvia.com. Ever wonder "What's the Harm?" with psychics, alternative medicine, etc? |
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#18 |
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Salem, Oregon
Posts: 17,135
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__________________
Who is "Kaz?" Read about her at www.StopKaz.com. Curious about Sylvia Browne? Read about her at www.StopSylvia.com. Ever wonder "What's the Harm?" with psychics, alternative medicine, etc? |
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#19 |
Intellectual Gladiator
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 15,948
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RSL for the win!
![]() Robert, seriously, would you be okay with me sharing this on my blog? (Link below) |
__________________
Visit my blog: The Skeptical Teacher "We ****** up the air, the water, we ****** up each other. Why don't we just finish the job by flushing our brains down the toilet?" -- John Trent, In the Mouth of Madness |
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#20 |
Penultimate Amazing
Join Date: Sep 2001
Posts: 32,473
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My wife didn't believe in psychics and mediums, in general. The psychic at the corner stores were "obvious fakes" to her. However, "proven" psychics that she saw on Montel or Oprah were real. It wasn't until she met me that she started to question these people. I explained to her how the tricks are done and about the JREF MDC. Now she's a non-believer.
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1. He'd never do that. 2. Okay but he's not currently doing it. 3. Okay but he's not currently technically doing it. 4. Okay but everyone does it. 5. He's doing it, we can't stop him, no point in complaining about it. 6. We all knew he was going to do it which... makes it okay somehow. 7. It's perfectly fine that's he's doing it. |
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#21 |
Illuminator
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 3,790
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Robert, Susan is a strong and intelligent woman. We all have blind spots until someone points to their weaknesses. It's little surprise that you two are a perfect match. Congratulations!
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#22 |
RSL Groupie
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 1,167
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#23 |
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Salem, Oregon
Posts: 17,135
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__________________
Who is "Kaz?" Read about her at www.StopKaz.com. Curious about Sylvia Browne? Read about her at www.StopSylvia.com. Ever wonder "What's the Harm?" with psychics, alternative medicine, etc? |
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#24 |
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Salem, Oregon
Posts: 17,135
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__________________
Who is "Kaz?" Read about her at www.StopKaz.com. Curious about Sylvia Browne? Read about her at www.StopSylvia.com. Ever wonder "What's the Harm?" with psychics, alternative medicine, etc? |
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#25 |
Intellectual Gladiator
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 15,948
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__________________
Visit my blog: The Skeptical Teacher "We ****** up the air, the water, we ****** up each other. Why don't we just finish the job by flushing our brains down the toilet?" -- John Trent, In the Mouth of Madness |
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#26 |
Illuminator
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 3,790
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#27 |
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Salem, Oregon
Posts: 17,135
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__________________
Who is "Kaz?" Read about her at www.StopKaz.com. Curious about Sylvia Browne? Read about her at www.StopSylvia.com. Ever wonder "What's the Harm?" with psychics, alternative medicine, etc? |
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#28 |
Penultimate Amazing
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 12,382
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What a lovely story. There's a really nice message here about labels and preconceptions.
Don't tick the box, folks. Our labels shouldn't define or limit us. |
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#29 |
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Salem, Oregon
Posts: 17,135
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__________________
Who is "Kaz?" Read about her at www.StopKaz.com. Curious about Sylvia Browne? Read about her at www.StopSylvia.com. Ever wonder "What's the Harm?" with psychics, alternative medicine, etc? |
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#30 |
Philosopher
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Perth, Western Australia
Posts: 6,057
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Im married to a catholic who believes in tarot and such.
She's a good source of comedy for me ![]() |
__________________
"Here we go again.... semantic and syntactic chicanery and sophistic sleight of tongue and pen.... the bedazzling magic of appearing to be saying something when in fact all that is happening is diverting attention from the attempts at shoving god through the trapdoor of illogic and wishful thinking." - Leumas |
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#31 |
Philosopher
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: The Connecticut School for Rumpology.
Posts: 6,030
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I could have been worse. It could have been "I married a ...
crossdresser" greencard seeking terrorist" alien who sucks your life force out of you slowly (OK, the 1st two are worse)" but you get the idea.
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My parents have been maried 56 years. My dad has alzheimers and my mom is at this moment in the hospital. if somehting happens to her he is going to fail no matter what I do. My dad would have been there for her every day like she has been there for her. It took me until my mid-forties to realize this but having a llifetime partner may have more upside than down. Keep recovering Robert and best wishes you woo Susan. |
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#32 |
Intellectual Gladiator
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 15,948
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Robert, here is the link to my blog post on this...
http://skepticalteacher.wordpress.co...married-a-woo/ |
__________________
Visit my blog: The Skeptical Teacher "We ****** up the air, the water, we ****** up each other. Why don't we just finish the job by flushing our brains down the toilet?" -- John Trent, In the Mouth of Madness |
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#33 |
Penultimate Amazing
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 28,756
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Robert it has not escaped the notice of this community that you pulled a cracker when you met your lady. She's been pretty damned impressive this past year.
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#34 |
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Salem, Oregon
Posts: 17,135
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__________________
Who is "Kaz?" Read about her at www.StopKaz.com. Curious about Sylvia Browne? Read about her at www.StopSylvia.com. Ever wonder "What's the Harm?" with psychics, alternative medicine, etc? |
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#35 |
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Salem, Oregon
Posts: 17,135
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__________________
Who is "Kaz?" Read about her at www.StopKaz.com. Curious about Sylvia Browne? Read about her at www.StopSylvia.com. Ever wonder "What's the Harm?" with psychics, alternative medicine, etc? |
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