Merged A new year means new Stundie nominations!

Travis

Misanthrope of the Mountains
Travis
Joined
Mar 31, 2007
Messages
24,133
Make one of your resolutions be to gather many, many hilarious Stundie nominees.

And then post them here.

Don't forget a link.
 
Both sides of the global warming debate are part of the elite's plan to trick you into not realizing that a new ice age is coming:
http://hawaiianlibertarian.blogspot.com/2012/12/when-shtf-its-teotwawki.html

Global Warming? A complete misdirection.

If you've spent anytime in political based debate forums on teh interwebz, you would know that one of the biggest points of contention is the right wings insistence that AGW is improbably because the climate is dependent on the Sun's activity...while the left completely discounts the sun and lays it all at the feet of man kinds behavior. That's the old thesis | antithesis of the Hegelian Dialect.

The dialectical synthesis is acceptance by both "sides" of left and right that the planet is warming...they only disagree on why.

By the time the general population of sheeple realize the ice age has commenced, it will be too late.

So the entire herd of brainwashed sheeple believes the planet is warming.

In the meantime, the elite have been building underground shelters, stocking seed vaults, and preparing for the coming ice age.
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From last year, but fully worthy:

http://mikebara.blogspot.com.au/sea...+that+there+is+no+such+thing+as+“Pareidolia.”

“The actual truth is that there is no such thing as “Pareidolia.” It’s just a phony academic sounding word the debunkers made up to fool people into thinking there is scholarly weight behind the concept. It’s actually a complete sham. … The word was actually first coined by a douchebag debunker ... named Steven Goldstein in a 1994 issue of Skeptical Inquirer. Since then, every major debunker from Oberg to “Dr. Phil” has fallen back on it, but it is still a load of B.S. There is no such thing.”
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Mike Barra
 
Graham2001 said:
From last year, but fully worthy:

http://mikebara.blogspot.com.au/sea...+that+there+is+no+such+thing+as+“Pareidolia.”



Mike Barra
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To follow Bara's claim to its natural conclusion, this is not a picture of a banana:

HBVqc.jpg
 
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matt.tansy said:
To follow Bara's claim to its natural conclusion, this is not a picture of a banana:

[qimg]http://i.imgur.com/HBVqc.jpg[/qimg]
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I was confused for a second. I thought that you were agreeing with Bara because I can't see imgur pictures at work. :D
 
BazBear said:
From the man who sees alien constructed ziggurats in a fair number of orbital photos of the moon... ""Oh wait, that one looks like a unicorn!":D
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You'd think he'd have worked out how to spell 'rebuttal'.

His main argument seems to be:

1. The Moon is clearly missing a nice ziggurat.
2. There aren't any ziggurats in NASA images.
3. NASA must have airbrushed out all records of a ziggurat.
4. I have airbrushed in a ziggurat.
5. There is a ziggurat.
6. Buy my book.

It's not just circular logic, it's Möbius strip logic that disappears back up itself.

Those aliens must have been kicking themselves. They go to all that trouble to build a large temple where it couldn't be seen by the only thing worth looking at and then some damned monkeys in a tin can fly right over it.
 
Heiwa thinks that falling objects should come to a stop from air friction. The most Stundielicious part is bolded.
Heiwa said:
Can you, e.g. explain re-entry. You are aboard the famous International Space Station, ISS, that according NASA is orbiting Earth every 90 minutes at 400 000 m altitude (almost vacuum) at 7 200 m/s velocity and you want to go down to Earth. It means you have to go down 400 000 m and slow down from 7 200 m/s to 0 m/s speed. How to do it?

Do you jump into a little capsule with a little rocket engine to slow you down? Yes, apparently you do that and the result is that you arrive at 120 000 m altitude but that the velocity then has increased to 9 000 m/s as some potential energy of the capsule has become kinetic energy = greater velocity. It is like diving from the 10 m board. It gets faster the closer you get to the water.

At 120 000 m altitude there is a thin atmosphere with nitrogene and oxygene atoms that you collide with and ... MAGIC ...
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Known to the rest of us as "friction", or "aerodynamic drag" if you want to get really fancy.
Heiwa said:
...suddenly you slow down to 100 m/s (at say 5 000 m altitude) and deploy a parachute and land. In a desert in Kazakstan. Where nobody lives. In the middle of nowhere!
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Because it's always better to drop a space capsule in downtown Moscow. But here comes the big finish:
Heiwa said:
Imagine that - you slow down from 9 000 m/s to 100 m/s just by colliding with atoms. But why don't you slow down to 0 m/s by colliding with atoms? Let me ask a stupid question or two? Why do you need a parachute at the end? What is wrong with colliding with atoms to the end?
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Yeah, why do those dumb skydivers bother with parachutes anyway? Why don't they let the atoms bring them to a stop?

Heiwa the self-professed engineer... putting the "terminal" in "terminal velocity".
 
sts60 said:
Heiwa said:
Imagine that - you slow down from 9 000 m/s to 100 m/s just by colliding with atoms. But why don't you slow down to 0 m/s by colliding with atoms? Let me ask a stupid question or two? Why do you need a parachute at the end? What is wrong with colliding with atoms to the end?
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Yeah, why do those dumb skydivers bother with parachutes anyway? Why don't they let the atoms bring them to a stop?
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Oh, every falling object is guaranteed to reach 0 m/s by colliding with atoms; it's just that some folks generally prefer that objects be recoverable and people be alive after that occurs.
 
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I was going to say that the ground is atoms and it most definitely will bring you to 0 m/s.
 
Cl1mh4224rd said:
Oh, every falling object is guaranteed to reach 0 m/s by colliding with atoms; it's just that some folks generally prefer that objects be recoverable and people be alive after that occurs.
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Travis said:
I was going to say that the ground is atoms and it most definitely will bring you to 0 m/s.
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And one has to wonder what it is that he thinks the parachute is doing all that time....
 
StankApe said:
I assume this is all the work of the international blanket cartel?
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That Hawaiian Libertarian probably believes this. He's the same guy who thinks that the California Walnut Commission was part of a anti-red meat conspiracy.
 
Why are the oceans rising?

"While it has (supposedly) been proven that these waters are, indeed, rising, I have to look deeper into this man-made lie. It would appear to me that there are several places around the world where there are underwater volcanos spewing out lava in places so deep in the ocean that, even though our Scientist's know about these places, they are not telling us about it. In other words, knowing how these Scientist's are on the Government payroll as liars, they are going along with this plan of "Global Warming" and are helping in creating this false illusion."

There's more:

"Between earthquakes in the oceans, which can and will cause water levels to rise (depending on the amount of shift (rise) in the Tetonic Plates) and these volcanos, it is my opinion that the waters are rising due mainly to the fact that the ocean bottoms are being replaced with lava or are being "risen" by earthquakes, or by a combination of both. And knowing how the HAARP system is being used these days, this rise in water levels is due more to man-made "desires" than that which would be "natural"."

http://www.davidicke.com/forum/showthread.php?t=232432
 
Supermac said:
Why are the oceans rising?

"While it has (supposedly) been proven that these waters are, indeed, rising, I have to look deeper into this man-made lie. It would appear to me that there are several places around the world where there are underwater volcanos spewing out lava in places so deep in the ocean that, even though our Scientist's know about these places, they are not telling us about it. In other words, knowing how these Scientist's are on the Government payroll as liars, they are going along with this plan of "Global Warming" and are helping in creating this false illusion."

There's more:

"Between earthquakes in the oceans, which can and will cause water levels to rise (depending on the amount of shift (rise) in the Tetonic Plates) and these volcanos, it is my opinion that the waters are rising due mainly to the fact that the ocean bottoms are being replaced with lava or are being "risen" by earthquakes, or by a combination of both. And knowing how the HAARP system is being used these days, this rise in water levels is due more to man-made "desires" than that which would be "natural"."

http://www.davidicke.com/forum/showthread.php?t=232432
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Scientists are liars - check
Scientists are telling the truth about the thing I'm on about - check
Evil Government - check
Mentioning scientific fact while claiming that knowledge is secret - check
Complete fail at understanding a branch of science while claiming understanding of it - check
Mis-spelling of scientific term - check
Inappropriate use of the possessive apostrophe - check
HAARP - BINGO!

If only he'd used more exclamation marks, random capitalisation and multiple colours...
 
threadworm said:
Scientists are liars - check
Scientists are telling the truth about the thing I'm on about - check
Evil Government - check
Mentioning scientific fact while claiming that knowledge is secret - check
Complete fail at understanding a branch of science while claiming understanding of it - check
Mis-spelling of scientific term - check
Inappropriate use of the possessive apostrophe - check
HAARP - BINGO!

If only he'd used more exclamation marks, random capitalisation and multiple colours...
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You forgot - Didn't even try to do basic math to see if this is even plausible as a cause for sea level rise.
 
Cl1mh4224rd said:
Oh, every falling object is guaranteed to reach 0 m/s by colliding with atoms; it's just that some folks generally prefer that objects be recoverable and people be alive after that occurs.
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It's like they tell you in EMT class - don't worry, eventually the patient's vital signs will stabilize - one way or the other...
 
Burnt feathers....

http://www.youtube.com/all_comments?v=MW31fOWzY-E

Youtube user vadimuskoro

"Hammer and feather shows another proof moon mission was a fake, because no feather can bare environment of a 250F as is on moon under sun light. Heat up your oven to even 200F, place a feather in it and mesure its duration before melt down or ignition, i suppose it should be below 10sec. p.s I dont mention rubber bottom shoes all appolonists warred."


I wanted to mention rubber bottom shoes, but thought better of it, I was going to suggest he stuck his feather in a vacuum, between his ears:covereyes
 
Hurricane Sandy was caused by chemtrails:
http://www.henrymakow.com/operation-sandy.html

HOW DOES NORMAL WEATHER WORK?

On a summer's day, the sun rises and begins to heat the ground and whatever is on it -- plants, oceans, lakes or streams.

This causes moist, heated air to rise and form clouds.

This warmed air continues to rise until it hits a barrier which is the cooler air above in the stratosphere.

One can see the warm and cold air meet because it is the invisible line at the bottom of the clouds. When the surface clouds penetrate into colder air they condense and form the beautiful cumulonimbus white clouds we see on summer days. The moist surface air rising into the colder stratospheric air has condensed into clouds while the cooler stratospheric layer prevents heated air from rising further.

As the day goes on, the sun goes lower and the moist clouds begin to cool and the stratospheric cooler air presses down upon the moist clouds. And if these clouds become chilled below their dew point, the result is rain. That is how the weather engine works.

But the U. S. Chemtrail Air Force hates normal weather. Its purpose is to destroy it.

They fly hundreds of old retired commercial aircraft which they have converted into spray-tankers. These tankers carry huge loads of powdered aluminum and boron dust which is sprayed from the highest altitudes they can achieve. The dust is light and it hangs in the air for the rest of the day. What it is does is to reverse the normal workings of the weather machine in order to create drought.

This aluminum and boron dust is abnormally heated by the Sun. Now, when the moisture laden surface air rises, it is not capped by a normal cold layer of air but, rather, it rises up and up into the artificially heated stratospheric air.

Thus, it cannot form clouds or rain but must rise, further into the now artificially heated stratosphere. The result is, no rain. The Chemtrail program puts weather-engine into reverse.

SO WHAT ABOUT SANDY?

Just prior to the hurricane called Sandy, according to the maps issued by the National Weather Bureau Service, the whole of the United States, from the Sierra Mountains in California to the State of Maine was experiencing a severe drought.

The U. S. Chemtrails Air Force is responsible.

During the days just prior to October 29th 2012, the artificially heated stratosphere pushed the colder Jet Stream further North than normal and this, drew tropical air from up from the South Atlantic. When this tropical air collided with colder air over the North Atlantic, it generated the largest hurricane ever known at this latitude.

Sandy was not an natural disaster. No, it was created; created by the U. S. Chemtrails Air Force and by those at the highest positions in the government who command it.

These are the facts

First: Sandy occurred far too late in the year; at the end of October. The hurricane season normally ends in August and not later. (Katrina occurred on August 29th 2005.

Second: A storm such as Sandy has never come ashore at New York City in the last 500 years.

Third: This storm was brought ashore at exactly the time of the Full Moon and its resulting high tide to maximize its effect. This was not a coincidence.
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There is an alternate dimension where white people are fighting minorities just like this one, and they can be helped by white people here meditating on hate for two minutes every day:
https://mindweaponsinragnarok.wordp...hone-calendar-to-remind-you-at-2pm-gmt-daily/

First of all, I want to take back the word “hate” the way other groups have appropriated attack words into pride words. There’s nothing wrong with “hate.”

The next thing I want to do is reinterpret Orwell’s 1984, as a model Mindweapon for us to use against ZOG.

For example, the coining of new words is a Mindweapon in 1984 (newspeak), and it is for us, too. Words such as ZOG, Mindweapon, MindWar, BRA, and the talismanic adaptation of numbers such as 14 and 18 and 88 and so on.

And something else from Orwell’s 1984 that can be very useful to us, the daily Two Minutes Hate, synchronized at 2PM GMT. All of us, for 2 minutes a day, at exactly the same time, expressing our Will! Not unlike the Two Minutes Hate of 1984:

I remember reading somewhere that a Buddhist said that 7,000 people meditating at once can change world events.

And that is my goal here — to get a minimum of 7,000 of us doing a Daily Two Minutes Hate at precisely 2pm, GMT. Ignore the daylight savings time and British Summer Time. Just go by what the world clock, liked below, tells you is 2PM GMT. In the EST Time Zone it is 9am, Central is 8am, Mountain is 7am and Pacific is 6am.

I suspect that there is a world or a dimension of conscious and thinking beings like us, but we are not able to go there and they are not able to go here.

However, the same battle we are having here, is happening in that dimension. I believe that. I sense it. When we die, we may very well take our consciousnesses and even our allegiances to that other side. Or we may go there when we are sleeping and dreaming, and because we are sleeping, we are impotent on that side. But if we can consciously affect the other side, then that may end up affecting our situation here.
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Travis said:
I was going to say that the ground is atoms and it most definitely will bring you to 0 m/s.
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Horatius said:
And one has to wonder what it is that he thinks the parachute is doing all that time....
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As has been pointed out to many a rigger, parachutist, window cleaner, etc. its not the fall that will kill you, its the sudden stop at the end of the fall that does it.
 
jaydeehess said:
As has been pointed out to many a rigger, parachutist, window cleaner, etc. its not the fall that will kill you, its the sudden stop at the end of the fall that does it.
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VRDS

Very Rapid Deceleration Syndrome
 
jaydeehess said:
As has been pointed out to many a rigger, parachutist, window cleaner, etc. its not the fall that will kill you, its the sudden stop at the end of the fall that does it.
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Well, unless it's from a superhero flying under you and catching you before you hit the ground. Then it's OK.
 
sts60 said:
Well, unless it's from a superhero flying under you and catching you before you hit the ground. Then it's OK.
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Gwen Stacy disagrees.

That "Snap" sound effect is the most chilling pannel in comics history.
 
sts60 said:
Well, unless it's from a superhero flying under you and catching you before you hit the ground. Then it's OK.
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Superman has the soft hands, yes he has that easy touch.
 
So the US Air Force is creating droughts for the lulz?

And why did they stop? We've been getting much more rain than normal lately.
 
One especially impressionable conspiratard who frequently posts on GLP has come up with an additional reason for the deployment of chemtrails.

His wife thought she saw the moon behind the sun on a very cloudy day (obviously because "they" were "chem trailing the hell out of the sky" that day) but the OP decided that it might be a second sun. He was sure of the location of our real sun by the glare behind the chemtrailed sky, so he took photos and posted them in his thread.

The quote:


I never believed in this second sun that people were seeing. Mow I am a believer and I have witnesses. I guess in time the chem clouds won't be able to hide it and everyone will see and feel its presence.
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Apparently there is never a clear day in this guy's neck of the woods for him to clearly see this second sun and its possible satellites because of the massive chemtrailing.

 
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