T.C. Albin, California Weatherman

More stupidity.

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The supernatural power that I claim to have and have demonstrated on several occasions is an ability to control the weather in certain aspects. If given a week before a date I can make it rain or not rain, cool or heat up within a few days of the target date. For example, if on Wednesday, December 1st in San Francisco it is sunny and 50 degrees, I could aim for Wednesday Dec. 8th for it to rain or jump up to 70 degrees. The result would be the weather I predicted on Tuesday, December 7th, Wednesday, December 8th or Thursday December 9th. Or I could stop the rain and make the temperature drop if it was raining or it was 70 degrees. I need about a week in advance to make seasonal changes in the weather.
Also, if given 5 months in advance I can cause unseasonal changes in the weather, such as snow in the early morning on July 27th in Kansas.
Finally, if I am in a town that is threatened by a tornado of hurricane, I can make the tornado or hurricane go around or miss the town.

I must be in the area the weather is intended for to change that area's weather.

T.C. Albin

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Although we no longer test claims involving "cloudbusting", this claim seemed to involve a bit more than that (albeit just as insane), so I was ready to accept it...until I got to the part about snow in Kansas.

I'm rejecting this claim.

Go ahead. Rip me to shreds. Tell me why I have to accept it regardless of the insanity of the "snow in July in Kansas" section.

My tolerance level (for BS, anyway) is defenitely on a downward trajectory.

A reply from Mr. Albin

Dear Mr. Kramer,
I have received your response to my Challenge Application. It is truly unfortunate that your foundation has chosen not give me an opportunity to prove my claims. Your letter suggested that I may contact you if I have any questions. I do have a question. Why did your foundation choose not to give me an opportunity to prove my claims?
-Thomas Albin

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Dear Mr. Albin,

We are in receipt of your email, and we have reconsidered our position regarding your claim.

OK, Thomas. Go ahead. We hereby accept your claim regarding making it snow in Kansas on July 27, 2005.

It is now January. Your claim states that you need 5 months advance notice in order to "cause unseasonal changes", so, causing snow to fall in Kansas this coming July 27 is squarely within your claim and your proposed test protocol. We accept. Go for it. Anywhere in Kansas will do just fine. And the snow must fall from the sky above, as if in winter, and NOT from a snowmaking machine, or from beneath your hat. The snow must be real. Go ahead, Thomas. Make snow fall in Kansas in July. Pick a city, too.
As for a time of day, how does high noon sound to you?

Here's my prediction: You will now begin to waffle. Or, you will start to make excuses. Or, you will ask why we didn't accept the other claims you put forth, as well, or instead. Or perhaps you will change the subject, or withdraw your claim because you feel that my "attitude" is too negative, or some other such nonsense. And you will NOT say, "OK. GREAT! I will make it snow in Kansas on July 27, 2005!!!"

Or, you will say, "Sorry, but I won't be in Kansas on July 27, so I cannot make changes there."

But, if you actually DO follow through with this claim, I'll make an additional prediction: You will chose Mount Sunflower as your location. If so, that's just fine.

Those are MY predictions...for what it's worth.

Your move, Thomas.

-Kramer, JREF

The legal threats begin...

Dear Kramer,

My claim also included that I must be in the area for the talent to work. My application clearly shows that I currently reside in California. I offer to make it snow in California on July 27, 2005 if you will accept that. Also, you should know that I will be sending all communications, including this one, to my legal counsel from this point forward.

Thomas Albin

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Dear Mr. Albin,

Ooooh, we're REALLY scared of you, and your "legal counsel".

We have your claim letter, which states you can make it snow in Kansas in July. We accept.

You want to make it California? Fine. How about Los Angeles?

I now predict you'll say "Sorry, but I can't do LA. How about the Sierra Nevada Mountains?"

To which WE will say, "No. Your claim is now rejected'.

-Kramer, JREF

I lost my Patience....

Mr. Kramer,

Again I must remind you that I must be in the area. Also I must again remind you that I live in Oakland. I happily submit that it will snow July 27th of this year in Oakland. To be exact some time between 12:00 am and 11:59 pm on July 27th of this year it will snow in Oakland California.

Also, it is your attitude and the attitude you have given other claimants, that caused me to secure legal counsel. I would want to safe guard myself from any possible fraud. Will you accept my claim?

Sincerely, Thomas Albin

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Well, I really lost my patience with this gentleman. I hate legal threats, accusations of fraud, and "snow in July" claims that I strongly feel are the sole, biggest waste of time I can be dragged into here. I know it's my job, but, the lawyer stuff really ticks me off.

This is an honest example of what can happen to me here when "Enough" crosses the line and delves deep into the realm of "Too Much". And it happened today. I've really had it. What a complete waste of time.

And you know, I can't help but wonder if this a joke-claim being made someone whose sole purpose is to post our correspondence on some woo-woo site, to show the world how bad the JREF's "attitude" is. Fine. Let them. If his claim is a false one made in an attempt to draw me into an angry debate, then it is the applicant who, if he had ANY morals whatsoever, should feel the pangs of shame in his heart, and not myself, nor the JREF.

My reply:

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Mr. Albin,

Your application ALSO clearly states that you will make it snow in Kansas on July 27th. We're not surprised that you've backed out of this claim immediately after having submitted it. Fine. I'm sure that your "lawyer" (imaginary as we surmise he may be) advised you to do so. It's a pity for you that you haven't given your other claims, and the notion that you even possess such "powers", equal consideration.

OK, Mr.Albin. We accept your claim in which you state that you will "CAUSE IT TO SNOW IN OALKLAND CALIFORNIA on July 27th, 2005", providing that we agree that the Oakland, California you are citing here is the one across the bay from San Francisco, and that the snow will fall from the sky above, as if on a mid-winter Colorado Mountain ski slope, and that it be of meteorological origin, and NOT made artifically by some kind of snow-making machine. The snow must be as a result of the weather, and NOT man-made. If you state your agreement to this, your preliminary test is a "GO".

Our acceptance of this claim, by the way, has nothing to do with your childish legal threats. You have made a paranormal claim. Just like the one regarding snow in Kansas, we have accepted it, according the rules of the JREF Challenge.

Our goal is to show the world how utterly baseless such delusions as yours are, and how people who fall into such beliefs are wasting their lives. What is YOUR goal, sir? Personally, I wonder.

You will be a fine example of precisely what we are trying to educate people toward; how such beliefs are NOT by any means harmless, but are, in fact, the dividing line between living a meaningful life, and a living a life completely devoid of substance.

We happily accept your claim, and anxiously look forward to seeing the results of this preliminary testing.

On July 28th, either you will get the worldwide notoriety and fame you obviously feel you have so cruelly been denied up to this point in your life, or, your file here in the JREF archives will be CLOSED, and added to the ever-growing stack of utter nonsense I am resigned to deal with, Monday through Friday, 9 to 5.

You say that you possess the paranormal ability to make snow in Oakland, California. Great. Now PROVE IT.

-Kramer, JREF Paranormal Claims Dept.

"My counsel"....

Sir,

Any casual investigation will reveal that this email address is from a law firm. My counsel has advised me that your application constitutes a formal contract and that this acceptance of my claim is binding. The Oakland, CA being referred to is in fact across the bay from San Francisco. I confirm that the snow in question will be entirely of meteorological origin and will not be artificial.

Sincerely, Thomas Albin

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Sir,

The JREF does not conduct "casual investigations" regarding the point of origin of vaguely threatening emails, as such emails do not frighten us in any manner whatsoever. Quite the contrary.

We are perfectly aware that the JREF Challenge application you signed is binding. Did you really think otherwise?

Other things that are binding, as your attorney may or may not have advised you, is that by putting your signature on the JREF Challenge application, you agree to adhere to the Challenge rules as stated therein. We fully expect you to do so, as per YOUR contractual obligation.

We also expect you to agree in your response to this email (as you have neglected to do in the email that I am now responding to) that the exact date upon which your claim asserts that you will cause snow to fall from the sky will be July 27, 2005. Please confirm.

Also, please confirm the name of your "counsel", address, phone number, fax number, and the name of the law firm in which he is employed, as it is our intention to contact him/her to be sure that he/she is aware that you are sending emails from their office, as your most recent email to us asserts.

You may also freel entirely free to have your counsel contact us to this effect, and any casual investigation of THIS email will show that we are now copying ("cc") our correspondence with you to OUR attorney.

-Kramer, JREF Paranormal Claims Dept.

Case Closed

Dear Mr. Albin,

We have not heard back from you since January regarding your claim. Our last correspondence involved talk of lawyers and other matters of little relation to the subject of snow in July.

As you have not responded to our last email (1-25-2005) in which we requested final confirmation of the date and location of the realization of your claim, your file is now closed.

Sir,
Below is a copy of the reply sent to you 1/25/05 giving final confirmation of the date and location of the realization of my claim. This e-mail was also sent to my attorney on that date. Your attempt to claim that I have not replied is false. Any attempt to invalidate my claim before 7/27/05 will be interpreted as a breach of contract and I will take legal action in response.
- Thomas Albin

Sir,
I affirm that it is my claim that some time between 12:00 am and 11:59 pm on July 27th of this year it will snow in Oakland California as a result of my desire for it to do so. The Oakland California being referred to is in fact across the bay from San Francisco. I confirm that the snow in question will be entirely of meteorological origin and will not be artificial.
- Thomas Albin

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Sir,

Bring on the legal action. We don't deal with litigious individuals like yourself.

And we received no response such as the one you listed below.

The JREF Challenge is not a forum for your childish threats, despite your attempts to make it so.

We will NOT respond to any further correspondence from you.

Like I said - BRING IT ON.

Goodbye.

No Show Snow

It did not snow at the appointed place & time, as per this applicant's claim.