Vivi Is "Near Something Yellow"

grunion

Penultimate Amazing
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One of the New York media's human interest stories emerging out of last week's Westminster Dog Show was the story of Vivi, a whippet who somehow escaped (or was stolen) from her crate prior to being loaded onto the airplane for the trip home. Last week saw massive volunteer searches of JFK airport and the swamps surrounding, interspersed with shots of the cute pooch and its weeping owner.

Now, it appears, the "official search" has been called off. But not to worry - an Army of Psychics, sensing vast numbers of gullible people and great media exposure, have stepped up to keep the story alive. Most prominent in this morning's treatment in New York Newsday is Beatrice Lydecker, who is given credit by the newspaper for accurately channeling a horse ten years ago to determine that one of its offspring had died. In fact Ms. Lydecker is so confident in her powers that she has issued a "media challenge" that ranks among the most asinine that I have seen.

It really galls me that an otherwise reputable newspaper would be so desperate to extend a fluff "cute dog" story that they have to pander to their readers' superstitions that psychics are a valid last resort.
 
No, "asinine" isn't the word for Bea's "media challenge". I think "this woman should be in a straightjacket" is more like it.

"I have also learned how to clear the body of AIDS, CEREBRAL PALSY, and several other problems related to the immune system"?

And, "The two easiest diseases to clear from the body are AIDS AND CP"?

And, "Give me 10 AIDS patients willing to try alternative treatments and I will prove to you I can clear them and rebuild the immune system"?

Okaaaaayyyyy...[backs away slowly]


If she can heal people so miraculously, why isn't she? There are certainly no lack of AIDS and CP patients out there who are desperate enough to try anything; if she really had any way to heal them, word of mouth would be bringing them to her door in droves, and she'd be famous.

No, take that back, she wouldn't be "famous", we need a word that's more powerful than merely "famous".

"God."

She would be a god, if she could cure AIDS.

Not to mention cerebral palsy.

What makes her think CP is an immune system disorder, BTW?



BTW, see also http://www.internationalskeptics.com/forums/showthread.php?t=52537
 
Any whippet near yellow will do.

Maybe this is why the psychic mentioned yellow:
imagebf0301b1-ba8a-4193-89f9-53e1f66de769.jpg
 
I believe you are thinking of huskies, not whippets. How's that for telepathy.

Now...

You guys wouldn't be irresponsibly using your magical gifts by channeling the spirit of Frank Zappa, would you? :boxedin:
 
This is so odd. I have on my yellow pants today and all the sudden a whippet ran up and started humping my leg.
 
Once again the Bible Code shall reveal the truth about Vivi's whereabouts.

Vivi is obviously the Roman Numeral for 6 6. Matthew 6:6 reads "But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly." A clear reference to hidden homosexuality.

Vivi's real name, Champion Bohem C'est La Vie, is an anagram of "I believe he's a homo, clap!". Westminster Kennel Club is an anagram of "We tremble wen 'e licks nuts."

"Whippet" is clearly a reference to "Whip It!", the hit song by Devo, the gayest group ever. The vision that she is "near something yellow" is a reference to the yellow hazmat suits they frequently wore.

Thus it's clear that Vivi has been abducted by the great homosexual conspiracy.
 
Once again the Bible Code shall reveal the truth about Vivi's whereabouts.

Vivi is obviously the Roman Numeral for 6 6. Matthew 6:6 reads "But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly." A clear reference to hidden homosexuality.

Vivi's real name, Champion Bohem C'est La Vie, is an anagram of "I believe he's a homo, clap!". Westminster Kennel Club is an anagram of "We tremble wen 'e licks nuts."

"Whippet" is clearly a reference to "Whip It!", the hit song by Devo, the gayest group ever. The vision that she is "near something yellow" is a reference to the yellow hazmat suits they frequently wore.

Thus it's clear that Vivi has been abducted by the great homosexual conspiracy.

Brilliant. :D
 
She has run off with the ghost of my golden retriever, Biscoe. After touring the Bermuda Triangle and Atlantis, they found and killed Bigfoot. Now, they have moved to El Dorado, where they bought a timeshare for the fountain of youth. She had some half-ghost puppies who have psychic abilities.
 
Now...

You guys wouldn't be irresponsibly using your magical gifts by channeling the spirit of Frank Zappa, would you? :boxedin:
Now who you jivin' with that Cosmik Debris? What kinda guru are you anyway?
 

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